Rage and Anger

on Monday, 19 October 2009.

Did you know that anytime you have ever been angry you had the perception of "Something unfair is going on here" first?  Do 1, 2, 3 with anger and you may feel better fast. 

1.     Name the Feeling: Angry
2.      Name the Cause: Something is going on that is unfair to you or someone you care about.
3.      Do a Satisfying Response: Ways to reduce feelings of anger.
 
a)      Check – was it really unfair? If it was fair, that changes your perspective.
-          Give yourself some cool-down time and reassess the situation; it might be fair.
-          Get other’s perspective on the situation.
-          Listen to the other side.
-          Step back and look at the big picture.
-          Were you in a bad mood or tired and being oversensitive?
-          Sometimes, it just is the way it is, and it’s equally unfair to everyone.
 
b)      Make fair. Whenever possible, attempt to regain fairness in the situation.
-          Let people know that it seems unfair to you.
-          Talk to someone in charge and tell them about the situation.
-          Stand up for yourself in a fair and caring way.
-          Join a group that stands up for rights.
-          Join with others that feel like you do and get support in your efforts.
 
c)      Forgive them and move on – real forgiveness reduces the anger.
-          Remember that forgiveness is NOT forgetting what happened.
-          Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you like the person or what they did.
-          Forgiveness has a more positive effect on you than it does on them.
-          Try to understand why they did the unfair thing. This makes forgiveness easier.
-          Realize that most of the time, they wish that they could do better.
-          Forgiveness gives you back your mental and emotional energy for other things.
-          Forgiveness gives you peace of mind when all other things *Taken from Cal Banyan's The Secret Language of feelings book. 
 
*For more information on how you can get deep forgiveness using hypnosis call our office.  Otherwise watch this SHORT VIDEO while you consider it.
 

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